Mischievous and honest to a fault, Bitcoin was born on January 3rd, 2009, the child of Satoshi Nakamoto, a mysterious programer(s) who, shortly after Bitcoin’s birth, abandoned him. This has left Bitcoin with a huge existential question, why was he created?
Jones, voiced by rapper Petey Pablo, has gone through tough times. Once a thriving car salesman, father of 10 kids, and husband of a beautiful wife with “divine titties”, his luck ran out when the 2008 financial crisis began. After losing his job at the car dealership, he turned to selling ice cream and narcotics. His life finds new direction however when by freak luck, he bumps into Bitcoin in New Jersey.
Satoshi Nakamoto is the mysterious creator of Bitcoin. Not much is known of him/her/them, only that he/she/they was/were a genius(es).
A fraction of Bitcoin’s size, Itty Bity’s represent the 21 million Bitcoin currencies that our hero Bitcoin will throw up in his lifetime. They are ornery, grumpy and will stop at nothing to get to their destination once sent. DO NOT stand in their way.
An OG of cryptography; Pal is a mysterious computer programmer who knows Bitcoin more than he perhaps knows himself.
Mitalik is a super genius, wunderkind and early Bitcoin adopter. After being rejected by Bitcoin he starts a project of his own.
Are you from the bank?
You know that guy who shrugged when he heard of bitcoin the first time? That was Harold. He is the cautionary tale, he’s the guy who bought the Bitcoin Pizza, he’s the one who put all his coins in Mt. Gox…. He’s the one that invested in Bitconnect. He’s the one who bought in December 2017 and sold in December 2018. This is Harold.
The Henchmen will stop at nothing to fulfill the will of Jamie Sapphire and the “Big Bank”.